Eating Me Alive: Bulimia

Eating Me Alive: Bulimia

2013

Model: Gloria Tan
Exhibited: Ngee Ann Polytechnic Arts Business Management Open House 2013

This project was the result of a Visual Communication assignment. The assignment required a photo essay of a chosen social issue.

The social issue that I chose to speak about was bulimia. It is an eating disorder where patients eat and then use various means of getting the food out of their system. The misconception many have of eating disorders is that the patient is always severely thin and light. This is not the case for bulimics. They are usually of average weight. The photos that were conceptualised and executed were done with the intention of focusing on the internal monologue and the constant inner battle that bulimics go through. They were not made to educate the viewer of the illness but to educate the viewer on the sufferer.

Do note however, that the inner monologue was done after watching countless documentaries and video logs of eating disorders. I personally did not go through bulimia and may not have accurately captured the inner battles these people face.

Pigging Out.
I love eating. I hate eating.

Purge.
Get it out of me.

Thin.
I want to be thin.

Control.
Finally, I'm in charge of me.

Fraud.
This mask hides the pain no one knows and imagines I go through.

Weight.
I weigh myself down.

Reflection.
Who is that girl staring back at me?

Break.
I want to break free; escape this unhappy story.

Lust.
I want more food.

Measure.
How will the numbers become smaller?

Stop.
Please stop.

Wrapped.
So caught up in this horrible mess I'm in.

Defeat.
I'm such a loser. I can't do anything well.

Scrub.
Let's scrub the toilet bowl and my mouth. Again.

Sleep.
It ends with the death of me or the death of the illness.